Love Resisted (Entwined Hearts #2) Page 22
“I love you,” he whispers and I smile at him.
“I love you too, baby,” I reply, but he shakes his head a serious expression on his face.
“You don’t understand, babe. I thought I’d lost you. I found you, unconscious in a pool of blood. I thought I’d never get to tell you that I love you again. I thought my life was over.” He lays his forehead on my thigh and takes a few deep breaths and my heart aches for my beautifully sensitive and deeply loving Caveman. Not ever knowing that one man could possess all those qualities at the same time.
The nurse bustles in and Saul lifts his head and gets up quickly moving out of her way, at his loss my body feels cold. He has a frown on his face and his arms are crossed waiting for her to finish. Once the nurse has checked me over, told me to rest, and that the doctor will be around soon, Saul comes back over and sits down. He holds my hand with both of his and smiles softly. Dane walks across and bends down to give me a gentle hug.
“Love you, Tink,” he whispers.
“Still here, bro,” Saul says tightly.
“Sorry, little brother, I’m just glad my sister-in-law is all good,” Dane replies with a smirk.
“Sister-in-law?” I splutter, as Saul’s eyes widen.
“One day, Tink,” Dane says as he salutes and leaves the room.
“Ok-ay,” I mutter. Saul still looks like he’s lost in thought.
“Saul, are you all right? He was only joking you know?” I say, worried that he’s freaking out. His eyes move to me, but they’re blank and now I feel the panic rising in my chest.
“It’s gonna happen,” he says taking me aback slightly as his words don’t match his face.
“What? Us getting married?” I ask and he nods.
“Of course, from the moment we got together this was it. Not for a little while, babe, forever. It was always gonna be that way. But it was nearly taken from us. You were almost taken from me. It almost broke me. I can’t go through that again, Soph. And it might make me seem like a pussy, but I don’t care. He’s still out there. Patrick. Until he’s caught, I want you to stay with me. I don’t want you to go out by yourself, and I know that you hate feeling suffocated but, babe, I hated feeling hollow.” He looks down at his interlocked hands, his jaw is set and I can see he’s trying to rein in his emotions.
“Of course, honey,” I tell him. His head whips up to me, eyes wide with surprise and the hard look he had a second ago has disappeared leaving a gentleness on his face that’s all for me.
“Really? You’ll cope with that?” he asks.
“Anything for you, Saul. I can’t imagine how I’d feel if I thought I lost you. You’re in every fibre of me, and when you’re not with me every one of those fibres knows something is missing. You didn’t know if I was going to die, Saul, I can’t imagine that. I’ll give you whatever you need.” He exhales a loud breath at my words and smiles, but it drops off his face almost instantly, and I feel my heart sink into my arse.
“What Saul? What else is there?” I ask with a sigh. He looks at me a combination of sorrow and anger swirls in his eyes.
“Patrick stabbed you, babe. Twice.”
I already know what he’s going to say, I’m almost prepared for it. What I’m not prepared for is the tears pooling in his eyes.
“There are some things I need to tell you, so will you let me tell you without speaking. This is gonna be hard for me to get out and for you to hear.” I nod, my hands are shaking and I tuck them under the bedsheets. “He stabbed you in the shoulder. It’s done some damage to your arm. Apparently, it will take about four months of physical therapy until you’re healed. But babe, they don’t know if you’ll ever be able to dance again.” At his words, my hand slams over my mouth as I catch a sob in my palm. My tears spill over my cheekbones and drip onto my other hand which Saul has grabbed in his. “The doc said you would dance baby, but maybe never in a professional capacity. It’s a wait and see situation.” I grind my teeth and bite the inside of my mouth. “The other stab wound caused more permanent damage.”
What he’s about to tell me I already know. I close my eyes for a brief moment to prepare myself, and as I open them Saul looks at me softly while gently stroking his thumb across my hand.
“He severed your fallopian tube. The surgeon seemed to think that Patrick has some sort of medical background as he appeared to know exactly where to cut and how deep to go to make that incision to cause the intended destruction. I’m so sorry, baby,” he whispers while squeezing my hand. The tears travel down my face in a constant stream. I wonder if your eyes can lose their reserve of water if you cry too much.
“I already knew, honey,” I whisper as Saul’s lips thin and eyes narrow. “He told me before he did it. He told me what he was planning to do to me.”
Saul stands up, his chair flying back and crashing into the side unit making the water jug and cup fall to the floor smashing into pieces. Water drips off everything, but Saul hasn’t taken his eyes off me.
“I’m gonna kill him,” he whispers.
Dane slams the door open his eyes full and cold. He glances at me, then to Saul and then to the floor and says, “Saul?”
Saul screams, “I’m gonna fucking kill him,” and storms out of the room.
Dane looks to me and I whisper, “Please make sure he’s okay.” Dane turns and jogs off after Saul.
A nurse rushes in tutting at the mess. “Are you all right my dear?” she asks checking me before moving to clean up the mess.
“Yes, I just told him something that happened when I was stabbed and he lost the plot a bit,” my voice cracks and I hiccup and cry at the same time.
“It will all be okay, dearie,” she tells me giving me a swift hug then going back to cleaning. I look out the window and wonder whether anything will be right again.
“Wait” Dane shouts, but I keep moving. He can tell me to stop as much as he wants, but I have one thing on my mind. Vengeance. “Fucking stop,” Dane shouts grabbing my arms. I wrench myself out of his hold and spin around to him, expecting to see anger on his face. I find myself surprised when I instead see compassion in his eyes.
“I get it. I do. Trust me. But she’s more important,” he says pointing up to the hospital.
“She needs you, and you just left her hanging. She’s crying. She’s just found out the likelihood of kids is small. She may not be able to dance anymore, and she’s in pain both physically and mentally. And you left her.”
I look to the ground and frown as I feel his words hit me hard. “Fuck,” I bellow and a few passers-by jump before shuffling away from me as quickly as they can. “I know I need to be with her, my body tells me that too. But he’s still out there, Dane. He is still out there,” I emphasise my point by shaking my hand to the roadside.
“I’ll deal with him,” Dane answers. His face is once again impassive and cold.
“What does that even mean?” I ask and he stares into my eyes for a few minutes.
“There is another side to me, little brother. A side I don’t ever want you to know. That side is useful for dealing with this type of situation. I’ll make sure he disappears and you won’t have to do anything other than be with Tink. You’ll know it’s done. But nothing else.” I stare into his eyes. These are not my brother’s eyes. This is someone else, and he scares the crap out of me. I stare up to the sky as the first few drops of rain fall, splattering cool water on my face. I let my body relax. It’s the first time I’ve felt relaxed in days.
“Okay,” I say and walk back to the hospital. I turn back before I go through the doors and watch Dane standing in the rain on his phone.
Finally, I’m getting out of this place, I feel like I’ve been held hostage. Saul has been amazing, his mood has lifted so much from the other week. Whatever Dane said, made Saul relax and now he’s gotten past the fact that he nearly lost me. He’s back to being his usual charming, loving and humorous self. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to get out of here though, or that I’m not bored out
of my brain. The doctors want me to stay in longer but I’ve decided to discharge myself. Two weeks is long enough in here. Saul wasn’t happy, but Dane has employed a nurse to visit our holiday home three times a day while Saul moved us into a big house for our indefinite stay. Con has managed to sneak Pea down to my room so I could see her before I leave in a few hours. She has also been here for two weeks and should be leaving in a few days, but Con has managed to pay for a private room so she can stay here and be with the baby. He pushed her through the doors in her wheelchair, her hospital gown was flapping open and she was shouting at him. I laughed so hard, I nearly popped my stitches, which resulted in Saul moaning at me…softly. That man won’t even raise his voice to me at the moment. He’s treating me like a piece of china, and for once I’m letting him. Dane is sitting on my bed as is Eric, and Rich stands somewhat uncomfortably in the corner.
I have to smile at him. It’s was pretty obvious he doesn’t like hospitals, but would do anything to make Eric happy. When everyone is settled, we all start talking, catching up on everything. Pea shows me a picture of their new baby girl.
“Have you decided what to call her yet?” I ask and Pea’s lips spread into a thin line.
“We can’t decide,” she answers.
“You mean, we can’t agree,” Con retorts.
“What do you expect when you want to call her, Theresa,” Pea snaps, frustration etched on her face.
“You know Theresa’s got it,” Con answers with a smirk.
“Got what?” Eric asks.
“Oh God, please don’t,” Pea says flustered and waving her hand about trying to magically stop what’s about to happen. Con glances at Saul, who grins and fiddles with his phone then sets it down. And I know what’s coming, I’ve seen this a few times over the years. I can’t help but smile and Pea shoots me daggers. Saul’s phone buzzes to life with the opening music of ‘She’s Got That Vibe’ by R Kelly. Con and Saul line themselves up, and as soon as the music starts they pretend to sing while doing the Running Man followed by something resembling a left to right slide, while crossing over in front of one another. This is why Con doesn’t dance, Saul is better than this, but fuck it’s funny. It’s like watching a crap version of Lip Sync Battle. I can’t help the laughter that erupts from me and I feel happy. Until the nurse bursts in and orders everyone out. Well, everyone but Saul, she’s realised now that she can’t get rid of him, no matter what she does.
As they start gathering their things together with collective grins, Con pouts his lips and snaps his head from side to side saying, “See Theresa’s got that vibe,” and winking at Pea.
Just as he’s about to walk out the door, Dane clears his throat. “Con,” he mutters and Con looks at him. “You do realise what that song’s about, yeah?” Con nods at Dane but then frowns.
“Do you want your daughter to have ‘that vibe’?” he asks him with a smirk.
“Motherfuck,” I hear as Con walks out the door and Pea giggles. Dane winks at me leaning down to kiss my forehead, he brings Saul in for a man hug pat down thing they do, then says, “Later,” and is out the door.
“Nearly time to go home,” Saul says coming to sit next to me.
“Mmm, I need to be in a warm bed, will you keep me warm?” I murmur and Saul looks at me with a tight smile. “We might not be able to have sex, but we can do other stuff, Caveman,” I tell him, but he shakes his head.
“Not gonna happen, Soph, not until you’re well.”
I laugh. “You might explode by then.”
He grins and it’s genuine this time. “I don’t think my right hand has seen this much action since early high school, babe.” I laugh at him.
It’s been a week days since I’ve been out of the hospital and I’m worried. Pea organised for Con’s friends to come over from America. She hasn’t cancelled the trip, saying it cost them enough money in airfares and she wasn’t about to make them lose all that cash.
I get it. I do. It’s just as I said to her, she’s been through an ordeal and her baby – still no name – is in the hospital. She’s coming back to our holiday home tomorrow as she has now lost her private room as it was needed by other patients. We’re all stuck in Cornwall, it’s just not ideal. Still, I should know Pea by now, I should know she wouldn’t listen.
“So just call Libby, she’ll get the guys on track. Then I’ll be out,” she tells me down the phone.
“Okay, hunny. Text me her number and I’ll call,” I answer.
“Do it soon, because by my calculations their plane will be leaving in about four hours.” She rushes out in panic.
“Pea, calm down. I’ll sort it,” I tell her.
“Okay Soph, thank you.” She’s silent for a moment, long enough for me to worry.
“Pea? You all right?” I ask.
“Soph…I just…I wanted to say thank you,” she says with a sniffle.
“For what?” I reply.
“You saved me,” she whispers and I feel a lump form in my throat.
“No hunny, I put you in that position,” I whisper back.
“No, Soph. He put us in that position. Sick fuck. The sooner he’s found, the better. But Soph, you saved me. You didn’t take your eyes off me and you tried to protect me, even taking devastating blows so he wouldn’t come for me. You saved me and my daughter,” she gushes and I can hear Con in the background saying, “Shhh.” I imagine he’s comforting her.
“I love you, Pea,” I gasp out before I finish with, “Bye,” and disconnect the phone. I don’t want to cry anymore. I never used to cry and it’s like I’ve allowed the bloody floodgates to open and now I can’t close them. I fear there are more to come. Saul and I still need to talk about the child issue. I sigh.
“Soph?” I hear from behind me and whip around on the sofa hissing in pain as I do. Saul’s face morphs from soft into hard at the sight of my pain.
“Come sit with me, honey?” I ask and he nods coming to sit next to me and slipping his arm around my shoulder. “Pea was on the phone. She’s had some plans for a while and she wants me to carry them out for her.”
His eyebrows pull together. “What plans? You’re still recovering too, babe,” he tells me what I already know.
“Don’t worry, Caveman, it’s just a phone call…well mainly.” He just arches his eyebrow at me. “So, Pea felt badly because Con came back from New York for her, and she’s worried that he misses his friends so she organised for them to come over for a visit. Tomorrow they’re due, and I need to tell them to come here instead of London.”
Saul now raises both eyebrows. “Shit, okay.” He doesn’t say anything else rubbing his chin in thought as he stares out of the window, then he looks back at me. “You know men don’t really care about this kind of shit, right babe?” he asks and I just shrug.
“What do I know? This is the first relationship I’ve ever had.” His jaw flexes under his stubble.
“The only fucking relationship you’ll ever have,” he states.
“Okay, my beautiful man, but there is something we need to talk about,” I say softly and he just stares into my eyes, penetrating me to my soul. “The child issue, Saul. I’ll never be able to give you a child.” At my words, his whole face goes soft and he kisses me gently on the lips.
“We’re gonna speak about this once, babe. So I want you to listen to my words and digest it. Sort out all that woman-overthinking-shit that you lot do, until it’s straight in your head. You have trouble, then of course talk to me again, but I’m gonna make this real simple.” He holds my chin and nods at me so I reflect his nod. Only when I do, does he continue, “You and me. That’s forever. There is, and never will be, anyone else for me. Whether it’s you and me. You, me and a kid, or you me and a fuck ton of them. As long as it’s you and me, babe, that’s what holds my world together. You. Just you. The rest we can do whatever you want. Whether that be trying to see how we can have a kid or doing absolutely nothing, and just living beautiful out together for the rest of our live
s. As long as I have you, the rest is just gravy.”
I snort at his comment, but I also have a stream of tears once again attacking my cheeks. He brings both of his hands to my face and swipes his thumbs under my eyes wiping all the tears away. “I love you, Saul James,” I tell him.
“And I love you, Sophie, soon to be Mrs. James.” He smiles and both of his dimples pop out. My eyes widen. “Don’t worry, not yet. We’ll know when, babe, just know that it will be happening.”
I watch as her face lights up. Did she ever think that I wouldn’t marry her?
“I always assumed you weren’t really the marrying type. No matter what you’ve said to me recently, I’ve had years of hearing you say you’d never get married, you’d never tie yourself down,” she says.
I guess that answers my question. She looks down to the floor so I grab her chin lifting her head so she’s looking straight at me.
“Soph, you’re not anyone else. You have had nearly all my past and you will have every second of my future. I want to tie myself to you in every way I can and I’m never letting you go, no matter what our future holds.”
She nods as her tears run over my hand. “I was thinking, Saul…I mean we don’t have to, it’s just I thought. Well…”
“Spit it out, babe,” I say with a grin and she smiles through her tears, which are thankfully drying up.
“Well, after talking to Dane about his childhood and knowing how we were both raised and that was by our real parents. I think…Well, we just have to look at our family. With the exception of Dane, you and Pea, none of us are blood-related. Yet we’re more of a family than either of us have had from our parents,” she stops and breathes in through her nose. “With the exception of my wonderful dad.”
I stroke my thumb against her knee where my hand is now resting. I can’t let my hand move any further upward or it will develop a mind of its own.
“Anyway, I thought it might be nice to foster and maybe one day adopt? You know, give a child who has nothing a chance for something?” she asks. I feel warmth burn through my chest as it swells with love, and my emotions threaten to take a hold of me.