Love Resisted (Entwined Hearts #2) Page 8

  Pea: Yeah funny. I want to go to AbsoluteRetro tonight. You game?

  Taking a moment to ponder it over, I need a night out.

  Me: Yeah. Absolutely.

  Pea: Fab. Ask Dane. I can’t be arsed texting anymore. It’s wearing me out. I’m going for a nap. We’ll come to yours tonight at 6 and leave from there.

  I roll my eyes and slide my phone into my back pocket. Going downstairs looking for Dane, I’m happy as I realise I don’t feel awkward in my new home.

  “Dane,” I call.

  “Yeah Tink, in the kitchen.”

  I wander into the kitchen. Dane is cutting up some peppers.

  “What you making?” I ask my tummy suddenly coming to life.

  Dane smirks. “Hungry?” he asks.

  “Depends on what you’re having,” I reply.

  He grins at me and answers, “Fancy an omelette.” I nod my head and smile. “Yeah, count me in.” He turns and grabs some more eggs.

  “So Pea said we’re going to AbsoluteRetro tonight. She’s meeting us here at six. You good with that?”

  He glances up at me. “Yeah, sounds good.”

  “Have you spoken to him?” he asks.

  “Saul?” I question even though I know who he means. “No,” I answer before he’s had time to reply.

  “I just thought maybe you should. After what happened the last time we were at that place.” He doesn’t say anything else, busying himself with the omelettes, but he doesn’t have to, I know what he’s trying to say.

  “Yeah, I do need to talk to him, but I’m not sure tonight is that night. I just need a bit of fun.”

  He nods in agreement and I have a thought.

  “Actually, I think I might call Eric and see if he wants to come,” I mumble nodding at myself.

  “I haven’t seen him for a while,” Dane says. “Not since I was going into work on a daily basis. Since I’ve stepped back, I haven’t really seen anyone.” He’s talking to me, but he’s looking out across the kitchen like he’s just realised what he’s said is true. And that actually bothers him, if the scrunching of his brow is anything to go by.

  I walk out of the kitchen and throw over my shoulder, “Let me know when my dinner’s done princess and I’ll come back. If you’re lucky, I’ll buy you a pretty apron and a new sewing kit.” He smirks as I wink at him while walking out texting Eric.

  Me: Hey, I’m going to a karaoke bar tonight with Pea and Dane and the usual, I want you there, you in?

  It only takes a few seconds for him to respond

  Eric: Abso-fucking-lutely Missy! I’m bringing Rich, he’ll hate it. It’s perfect!

  I laugh at his response.

  Me: Okay, we’ll swing by and get you on the way. About 6.30.

  Eric: Perfect! Do I need me a dress?

  I roll my eyes at him, always the diva.

  Me: It’s not a drag club, but if you want to wear a dress then you go for it.

  Eric: Not for me! I’m not in the mood for drag tonight. Anyway, I need some new makeup first. I was going to have a dress ready for you.

  Me: Me? Why?

  Eric: It’s been so long since you’ve been out and that’s not like you. I assumed you had sent your clothes to the dry cleaners and it burnt down with all your stuff inside. Otherwise, why haven’t you been out! There’s no excuse!

  I chuckle at the drama queen.

  Me: No, just not been feeling it. But I’m better now. See you tonight.

  I hope he gets that I’m not in the mood to talk.

  Eric: Hmmm. Okay…for now. See you later. Smooches.

  I smile and hear Dane call me for my omelette.

  A few hours later and we’re on our way to collect Eric and Rich. I decided to go with Dane. Con and Pea are in Saul’s car.

  Dane reaches out and grabs my hand. “You okay?” he asks.

  I nod but say nothing.

  “Things will work out, I’m sure of it,” he tells me.

  I look over to him. “Is that how you feel about your own life?” I ask and he flinches slightly. I feel like a bitch. I wasn’t trying to be, but I don’t feel sorry for asking. He needs to wake up. He can’t live the rest of his life in this limbo that he seems to exist in at the moment.

  “Touché Tink. The truth is I don’t know. I want to say yes, but at the moment I don’t see how that’s possible,” he states.

  I don’t reply, there’s nothing to say. I want to fix his issues, but I know from my own experience you can only really fix yourself. You can be there for someone else, but the change has to come from within.

  Fifteen minutes later and we’ve stopped. Eric and Rich have jumped in the car and Eric hasn’t stopped talking. We’re not too far from the karaoke bar now and I zone out of Eric’s constant chatter and try to take stock of my life.

  I have a job I hate, and I’m in love with someone who doesn’t feel the same way about me. I have no family and no car. I’m not sure why the car is necessary, but it seems like something that needs to be added to the list.

  I try and focus on the positives. I have friends who are closer to me than any family I’ve ever had experience with, and that’s only going to increase when Pea and Con’s baby is born. I have my health…that’s always a bonus. I’ve been dancing again lately, and truthfully, I’ve loved every minute of it. Somehow, it makes me feel like I’m making my dad proud. He always took me to my dance classes.

  Be brave. It’s what he always told me.

  It’s my motto in a way.

  “Be brave,” I breathe out quietly.

  “What?” Dane whispers. Eric is oblivious in the back still chattering away.

  “Nothing,” I say shaking my head but smiling. Dane looks at me like I’m crazy. That’s okay. I am. Who wants to be normal? Not me!

  I know what I have to do. I need to speak to Saul. We’re grown now, we’ve all been through so much. It’s time I laid my cards on the table once and for all, and if he rejects me then it will be my final hurrah and I’ll know I need to move on.

  A couple of hours later and we’re all sitting around a table at the bar and listening to both good and bad karaoke. Right now, we have a guy up singing Chris Brown, thinking he’s all gangsta.

  “Oh Lord!” Eric says with his lips pursed and eyebrow cocked.

  “We should go up there!” he says flapping his hands at Rich, who just raises one eyebrow at him and shakes his head, no. Saul and Con laugh

  “What are you two laughing about?” Pea jumps on them, but I know what she’s doing and I’m game.

  “Yeah, I do believe you two still need to go up and sing yourselves,” I add fuel to the fire.

  Con and Saul lost a bet to Pea and me last month. The bet was stupid, the winning team was the one who could throw skittles in the air and then the other person had to catch them in their mouth. The first team to miss one lost, the boys missed first. Their forfeit was to get up on stage and sing. I think that’s probably why Pea wanted us all to come here tonight.

  “Okay!” Con says. “I don’t back out of a bet. Come on Saul, you too Eric.” And he gets up. Eric claps his hands together in glee and Rich shakes his head again, but with a grin on his face and love in his eyes.

  Five minutes later and the person on stage stops singing. Then they announce the guys…well, I assume it’s the guys, possibly having been given a band name by Eric.

  “Welcome on stage for the first time, The Nine Inch Males. Be kind everyone.”

  Pea and I burst out laughing and Dane and Rich both wear shit-eating grins.

  The music starts and immediately I’m on my feet and fighting my way onto the floor just in front of the stage as the guys start singing to Color Me Badd’s – ‘I Wanna Sex You Up.’ I haven’t heard this song in years. I stand watching them as they start with the ‘ooo's.’

  It's obvious Con and Saul are feeling uncomfortable and stiff, whereas Eric is completely into it moving his body and jiggling to the beat like he's in a music video. I cheer for them and th
e crowd around me join in too. This seems to relax the guys somewhat because they start singing and moving more…it's definitely better than the lame swaying they have been doing. At about the halfway point, all three lads have completely immersed themselves in it. The crowd are egging them on, and they love the attention.

  Then they break out moves that have me doubled over with laughter. Fuck knows where it comes from, but one minute they're jiggling from side to side and the next minute Eric turns around and is twerking his arse to the crowd. Saul is doing the Running Man, and Con is doing something altogether different. He has his leg bent at the knee and is holding his ankle while his other hand is on the side of his head. He’s kind of dancing like an ostrich on Red Bull.

  I laugh so hard I double over from pain in my tummy. Jumping when I hear a snort followed by laughing right next to me until I turn and realise its Pea and she’s flapping her arms and trying to catch her breath through her own laughter. Nodding my head and turning back to the guys, they always make me laugh. I catch Saul's eye and he winks at me, and I - like a teenager watching a boy band - go all gooey inside and feel my heart flutter.

  An hour later and I was just thinking how to suggest going home.

  “Come on let’s go across the road,” Pea whines wiggling in her seat. Since about nine o’clock she’s been saying she wanted to go to the club opposite. I think it’s some crap about having a baby soon and being a mum. It’s like she needs to sew her oats, but with nights out before the baby comes. I smile and see Saul grin too.

  Con narrows his eyes at her and says, “Precious, don’t you think we should start thinking about heading home soon?”

  “You go home if you want to be a grandpa, I want to dance. Fuck me, I’m not in my grave yet!” She frowns and he rolls his eyes skyward.

  “Pea, you’re six months pregnant. Look at you.” He points to her stomach and it’s the wrong thing to do. He doesn’t get a chance to carry on what he was going to say because she snaps at him.

  “Oh, I’m so fat that I shouldn’t be seen in public now?” She doesn’t give him a chance to answer. Instead, she grabs my arm and yanks me out of my chair. Fuck she’s strong since she got knocked up. She’s pulling me behind her before I know what’s happening. Turning I grab Eric and we both get pulled out of the karaoke bar. I glance behind me in time to see everyone else getting up and grabbing mine and Eric’s stuff so they can follow us. In seconds, we’re at the club entrance. Pea has dragged us to the front of the line and is telling the bouncer how he has to let us in because she’s pregnant. He doesn’t look convinced, but I think he gets sick of her bitching because he moves aside so we can enter, giving me a wink as I walk by.

  We get inside and Eric announces he needs a drink immediately. We’ve just walked into the main room about to make our way to the bar when some guy puts his arm across the front of me blocking my path and causing me to come to a halt.

  “Erm excuse me,” I say confused. “Can you move?” The tone of my voice doesn’t imply I’m asking.

  “Just want to chat for a moment. You have a minute don’t you?” His eyes run me over and I feel my skin crawl. I watch Pea from the corner of my eye. She’s about to say something, but I shake my head telling her to be quiet because she doesn’t need to be in the thick of anything. I look back to the prick in front of me. He’s only about an inch taller than me, which puts him at five foot eleven. I know this as I have flats on today. I was only expecting to go to karaoke and not a bloody club.

  I open my mouth, but before I have a chance to reply Eric does. “Figure you must be hard of hearing, the lady said move!”

  The prick’s attention turns to Eric now looking at him with disgust. “I don’t need a pansy boy telling me what to do,” he snarls.

  “Please don’t breathe on me, you’re bleaching my hair,” Eric replies and Pea and I start laughing…probably not the wisest thing to do, but in my defence it was funny.

  “I’ll give you some advice before I lose my temper and shut you up with my fist. Why don’t you fuck off and find a pretty boy to stick his dick in your mouth, then maybe you’ll keep your trap shut.”

  “He already has a fucking pretty boy limp dick,” I hear from behind me and I know Rich has just turned up. I see the prick’s eyes widen slightly before he changes back to his false bravado. He chuckles and looks behind him to his friends who move closer letting him know they have his back. Tossers. The lot of them.

  “Maybe you can tell him to keep his nose out of my business then, especially when I’m trying to talk to this sexy mama.” He gestures toward me.

  “Oh, my fuck. Fuckity, fuck fuck. Fucker fuck….did you just call me sexy mama? Are you high? No wait….let’s get this straight, you think you’re a Cuban drug dealer? No? What the fuck is wrong with you? Really? Do you think after stopping me and not moving out of my way when I asked, then being rude to my friend and very obviously a homophobe with a tiny dick that I’m going to want to talk to you? This is, of course, not even getting to the fact that you’re practically the same height as me, you’re balding on top, you have a fake tan that would make the Tango man jealous, and you have your shirt open. We’re in a club at night…it’s not that hot and neither are you!” I shut my mouth when I realise that the few people around us are actually watching the show. Noticing his jaw is tense he narrows his eyes at me.

  “Listen bitch,” he says and grabs my arm.

  That’s as far as he gets because Saul seems to materialise out of nowhere and rips his hand off me, pushing the guy backward with one hand while using the other to gently push me behind him. Saul spins him around and pins him to the wall whispering something in his ear. For a split second his friends go to make a move then they spot Rich, Con and Dane and decide their drinks are much more interesting.

  Saul lets him go and walks back to me. “Let’s go. It’s late. We should all be getting home,” he tells us and nobody argues. As we walk out, I look at Con, who’s holding Pea and talking softly to her. Rich is talking to Eric, who’s fanning his face and looking at Rich like he wants to eat him up. Dane is striding up front as people watch our group depart.

  Saul steps next to me as we walk out. “You okay?” he asks. “Yeah, I’m good. Thanks,” I reply and he nods at me.

  “Good.”

  “Saul.”

  “Babe,” we both speak at the same time.

  “You go,” he says.

  Be brave.

  “I want to have a chat with you when you have time…maybe this week?” I ask quietly, well as quietly as I can while walking out of a noisy club. This isn’t something I want to share with the group. Not yet.

  “Yeah, that sounds good. Let me know when and I’ll come get you,” he replies.

  “That’s fine, but can we make it later in the week?”

  “That works,” he states. And with that we’re all outside and heading to our cars. I don’t speak as I’m getting into Dane’s car, but I stare over to Saul and find his eyes burning into me. I smile at him and know if I could have those eyes burning into me for the rest of my life then I’d die a satisfied woman.

  Fuck but her smile could bring me to my knees.

  I look away from her and drive off. I need to prepare what I’m going to say to her tomorrow. For so many years, I’ve pushed her away and now I want to mark her as mine. I shake my head at myself.

  “You okay, bro?” Con asks and I nod at him.

  I will be okay, once Soph realises she is mine. That I’ve changed and I’m worthy of her. If she doesn’t believe me, I’ll spend the rest of fucking forever proving it to her.

  “Fuck!” I pace back and forth across my gym. After letting Soph get into Dane’s car tonight and watching her smile at me, I wanted to punch someone. Ever since Dane’s visit he’s taken my fucking blinkers off where Soph is concerned, and now I can’t bear watching her with anyone else. Even sitting in the passenger seat of Dane’s car like she was his to take care of had my teeth on edge. The sooner I talk to
her the better. I might be a cocky shit assuming that one chat will make all those years of pushing her away just disappear. I’m not a moron. I know what I’ve done. I went from ignoring my feelings to not being able to switch the fucking things off. And seriously, I can’t think of her not being mine. I can’t even consider it because the thought makes me want to break something. And the idea of her being with another guy…that makes me want to break him.

  I shake my body out, sweat drips down my chest. I’m much better and nearly ready to go back to Murphy’s. I walk to the corner grab my face cloth, rub myself down and head to the shower. As I’m about to leave, I snatch up my phone and decide now is as good a time as any to set this shit straight. She wanted to have a chat. Fuck knows why? But she has all the control, now I’m taking it back.

  Me: So I’ll come pick you up tomorrow. 10am.

  I wait and watch, knowing I need an answer before I do anything else. My phone buzzes.

  Soph: Demanding?

  I chuckle at her, even when she’s snippy she makes me smile.

  Me: Yep.

  Soph: Okay Mr. Bossy! What should I wear?

  Now there’s a question.

  Me: Really want me to answer that babe?

  Soph: Point taken. I’ll be ready.

  Me: Good.

  Soph: So bossy and cocky.

  I chuckle again and go to the shower feeling much lighter and knowing I’ll be thinking about her every second from now until tomorrow.

  Shit, what the fuck is she doing to me?

  I step into the shower with one thought on my mind…it’s entirely possible that she just might be my saviour.

  I was trying to get my head straight knowing last night that everything had gone on long enough. I knew I needed to talk to Saul and be straight with him. Tell him how I feel and how he affects me. I need to be brave. Those words ring in my ear a lot, but lately it’s been every day. Like the universe is telling me something I already know – everything beautiful is worth fighting for – and damn it, Saul just doesn’t realise how beautiful he is, inside and out.